Chapter 98: The Mountain God's Mischief
Zhu He went through the motions of performing the Earth-Gathering Mountain Formation Technique, pinched out the character "mountain," burned the yellow talisman, paced the starry steps and exhaled, finally pressing his two fingers together, pointing at the earth talisman on the ground, and softly intoned: "By the decree of the Three Mountains and Nine Marquis, I command!"
Zhu He maintained this posture, his fingers pointing downward, his expression growing increasingly awkward, because the character "mountain" on the ground remained completely still. Sweat beaded on Zhu He's forehead. Several crucial points to ensure the talisman's efficacy—such as when burning the talisman, how much true qi to inject into the yellow talisman from which qi reservoir in his own body, and so on—Zhu He asked himself and found no errors. By all rights, it should have succeeded.
According to the explanation recorded in the yellowed ancient text, the so-called "pinching earth to create a mountain" in the "Mountain-Opening Chapter" did not actually produce a real peak. This was vastly different from the "Spitting Across the River Talisman" described in the "Water-Crossing Chapter," which was literally what it claimed. After gathering the earth, the character "mountain" would become a bridge for the local mountain god or earth deity to step out of their hidden dwelling. As long as the request was not too unreasonable, the deity invited out would mostly agree to the burner's request, because the yellow paper talisman itself was akin to a visiting gift. As long as the god governing that region's waters and mountains appeared, it meant they were willing to open their door and welcome guests.
But Zhu He felt that this last-minute prayer ceremony of his had most likely failed.
However, when Zhu He followed a tremendous noise and looked toward the mountain ridge, trees toppled one after another with a crash, clearly indicating some massive creature was rapidly ascending the mountain, its target squarely aimed at the stone clearing at the summit where everyone stood, charging upward with overwhelming force.
The astonishing commotion reverberating through the mountains caused Zhu Lu, Li Baoping, and the others to quickly gather toward Zhu He. Zhu He turned his head and said in a deep voice: "Fall back! Stand in the middle of the stone clearing and don't act rashly. No matter what happens next, don't come near me."
The youngest, Li Huai, pale-faced, tugged at Li Baoping's sleeve. "It's not a man-eating monster, is it? Or maybe it's the mountain god causing trouble? Earlier, Chen Ping'an told Ah Liang not to casually sit on tree stumps, saying they were the mountain god's chairs and couldn't be sat on..."
Li Baoping crossed her arms, looking confident. "We shouldn't panic. Even if Uncle Zhu can't hold off that thing, Little Uncle and Ah Liang will be here soon to help."
But the red-cotton-padded-jacket-wearing girl's fair hands showed bulging veins on the backs, clearly not as calm as she appeared on the surface.
Lin Shouyi was actually the most composed, with a hint of anticipation hidden in his eyes.
Zhu Lu looked at her father's back; she was actually more worried than Li Huai.
Suddenly, Zhu He looked down and saw a short old man no taller than his waist, with disheveled white hair and beard, holding a dark green bamboo cane whip, furiously striking Zhu He's calf like a petulant thug venting his anger. When Zhu He looked down, the old man met his gaze for a moment, then reluctantly withdrew his hand, stepped back a few paces, and spoke hoarsely: "Do you know the Common Speech of Eastern Treasured Vial Continent?"
Zhu He nodded, stunned.
The old man asked again: "What about the Great Li official language?"
Zhu He nodded again, still not recovered from the shock.
The old man, holding the green cane, jumped up and struck Zhu He on the shoulder with it. After landing, Zhu He felt nothing, but the old man himself stumbled and nearly fell, quickly grabbing his lower back. In exasperation, he cursed in Great Li official language: "Damn your ancestors eighteen generations back! You've got no real skill, but you're the best at causing trouble. I've been hiding like a scared mouse for hundreds of years, pitifully dodging those beasts. I thought I'd just drag out my existence like this. Finally, I got this once-in-a-thousand-years chance to turn things around, waiting for the Great Li court's big wave of officially enfeoffing mountain and river deities. I could finally become a wife after being a daughter-in-law, rising from Earth Deity to Mountain God. Then I wouldn't have to endure this humiliation anymore. Even if I still can't beat them, at least I could barely fill my stomach..."
The old man kept cursing while wiping his tears with his arm, utterly grief-stricken. Finally, he smashed the ground with his bamboo cane: "If you've got the guts, go fight those beasts yourself! Damn your ancestors eighteen generations back! Using a crappy talisman to drag me out, not letting me hide, and now I have to die together with you cursed lot, swallowed by a snake! Is this a suicide pact? Am I a pretty young girl or a fading beauty? Is this your type? Huh? Tell me loudly! Damn your ancestors..."
The green-bamboo old man seemed to have his throat choked; he couldn't utter another word.
Zhu He turned his head and felt a chill down his spine.
A massive black head, as big as a water vat, slowly rose from the mountain ridge, finally fully appearing in the view of everyone on the summit stone clearing.
A pair of silver eyes, a scarlet tongue as long as a large log, flickering rapidly with a hissing sound.
This black snake, astonishingly huge beyond belief, slowly dragged half its body onto the stone clearing. Its head and back had symmetrical large scales, its entire body black as ink, gleaming in the sunset.
Though it was a beast, its eyes were eerily human, looking at the white-clad old man whose hair and beard were tangled like a mess, with a mocking expression, as if saying: After all these years of cat-and-mouse, I've finally caught you.
The old man seemed to have resigned himself. He plopped down on the ground, dropped the bamboo cane that had been his constant companion, beat his chest and kicked his legs, wailing: "What a sin! A dignified Mountain Earth Deity, bullied to this state by a beast. There's no way to live anymore..."
The black snake slowly straightened its body and raised its head, revealing a pair of small claws on its belly, like the four-clawed pattern embroidered on the robes of secular dynasty princes, not the five-clawed one on imperial dragon robes.
But that one-claw difference was negligible to everyone on the summit and the short old man who called himself an Earth Deity.
The old man's eyes suddenly darted around. He abruptly stood up, raised his head to look at the black snake, and said excitedly: "This martial artist brute's skin and flesh must be tough. You came for those tender-skinned little kids behind me, because every one of them is brimming with spiritual energy, right?"
The old man grew more excited, spittle flying, laughing loudly: "Eat, eat, eat! Eat your fill, and you'll finally achieve the true form of an Ink Flood Dragon. Then you won't need to covet my stinky hide anymore. I'll be your Great Li Chess Pier Mountain God, and you can strive to be your River-Walking Dragon. Before you walk the river, you're still the mountain king here, still free to crap on my head. So eating me now is pointless. Sure, it would increase your cultivation a bit, but I'm still one of the Earth Deities. For your future river-walking to become a dragon, it would be a big obstacle. The true deities of rivers and lakes would unite against you, constantly throwing obstacles in your path..."
The black snake's huge mouth split into a slight crack, like a human sneering. Its head nodded toward the area behind the old man.
The old man was dumbfounded again. He collapsed to the ground in despair. This time, there were no tears streaming down his face, just a dry howl: "A male and a female, both seeking the Way. You'll eat those Confucian little kids, like elixirs, to lay the foundation for river-walking and dragon transformation. Your wife will eat me to smoothly usurp the position of the next mountain god. Good plan, good plan. I admit defeat. I admit defeat..."
The tattered white-clad old man's eyes were vacant, muttering: "The great Dao is unpredictable, that's all."
In the distant past, two enlightened immortals once traveled together on clouds, took a fancy to this mountain, and descended to play a game of chess at the summit. One waved his sleeve to level the mountaintop, using his finger as a sword to carve nineteen lines for the board. One pinched earth spirits into black pieces and grabbed cloud roots for white pieces. They played for over a month. With each move, the pieces took root and transformed into living beings of heaven and earth: black pieces became black snakes, white pieces became white pythons, lying motionless on the summit board. When a white piece was captured, it was devoured by nearby black snakes, and vice versa.
That game was evenly matched. The two immortals, with heaven-defying powers, left before the outcome was decided, satisfied. When they left the mountain, over a hundred black snakes and white pythons remained on the summit. In the long years that followed, the black snakes and white pythons fought each other, crazily devouring each other. In the end, only one black snake, on the verge of shedding its skin to become an Ink Flood Dragon, and one intelligent white python, with wings sprouting from its waist, survived. For some reason, this pair of black snake and white python stopped fighting and became mates.
They were extremely cunning and treacherous. Initially, they avoided provoking cultivators who could threaten them, only preying on lone travelers and merchants, and never too frequently, mostly coming out to kill during heavy rain or snow. Over centuries, relying on their natural longevity, they slowly accumulated physical strength, patiently waiting for the opportunity to prove their Dao. They precisely targeted their prey, and gradually began to choose martial artists and Qi refiners who were somewhat accomplished, making their strength increase faster and faster, to the point where even a mountain Earth Deity became a coveted dish. In the early days, they coexisted peacefully enough—the Earth Deity couldn't do anything about their ravages, and they couldn't catch the slippery old Earth Deity like a loach.
Li Huai couldn't hold back anymore and cursed loudly: "A piece of trash like you deserves to be an Earth Deity or Mountain God? Heaven isn't blind!"
The old man, his back to the children, smashed the ground hard with his bamboo cane, too lazy to argue with them, just muttering under his breath: "It probably is blind."
Zhu Lu was actually the most furious and angry, but when she saw that black snake, the girl's entire body trembled uncontrollably. At the peak of the second realm, she realized she didn't have the courage to face that monster, not even one step, just one step—she didn't have the guts to take it.
Zhu He, as a fifth-realm martial artist, had plenty of courage. Moreover, he couldn't afford to retreat even half a step, with his young lady and his own daughter behind him. The man didn't dare to turn around, but he roared in warning: "Zhu Lu! Be careful by the cliff edge! There's another beast hiding in the shadows!"
The girl could only move her lips slightly, as if to tell her father not to worry, but her voice was as faint as a mosquito's buzz.
Zhu He couldn't bother with that. The black snake lazily swaying its head in front of him was already giving him a suffocating sense of intimidation.
From the air beyond the cliff, a buzzing sound rang out sharply.
Zhu Lu, Li Baoping, and the others turned in horror.
A slightly slender snow-white python hovered not far from the cliff, in the high air. It didn't have four claws, but a pair of nearly transparent wings vibrated rapidly. Its gloomy eyes fixed on the girl Zhu Lu, its tongue flicking repeatedly, thick white snake saliva dripping down, like a glutton drooling over a delicacy.
It scrutinized the delicate girl's figure, finally fixing its gaze on her face.
Zhu Lu, stared at by this beast, felt her legs go weak, her whole body powerless. Though she didn't fall, breathing became difficult. The girl knew clearly that even moving a finger was a luxury, let alone throwing a punch to repel the enemy.
She didn't even know that her face, which she had always been somewhat proud of, was already covered in tears.
From the first day she started practicing martial arts, she had dreamed of the martial world. At this moment, she was filled with pain and regret.
She shouldn't die here. How could she die here?
The girl's eyes, brimming with tears, were full of pleading.
The white python was completely unmoved by the girl's pitiful expression. It just stared intently at that lovely face, drooling even more, as if the next moment, that face would become its own.
The Earth Deity old man, seeming dejected with his head down, was actually darting his eyes wildly, glancing from the corner of his eye at the character "mountain" formed by pinched earth, covered with the ash from the burned yellow talisman. If it would help, he would gladly lie down and blow the ash off the character with puffed cheeks. But he knew it would be futile.
Lin Shouyi began to grow anxious, looking left and right.
Li Huai, on the other hand, twitched his mouth, wanting to cry but not crying. He crouched down, leaning against the small green bamboo box at Li Baoping's feet, hugging his knees. A cool sensation came from behind. The child missed his mother's scolding all day and his father's thunderous snoring every night.
Only Li Baoping's gaze grew increasingly firm. Though the little girl was sweating profusely, she still held her chin high, showing no fear.
The black snake suddenly lunged its head at Zhu He.
Zhu He, who had been holding his breath and carefully gathering strength, stepped back with one foot and forward with the other, meeting the black snake's massive head with a direct punch.
Zhu He's fist force was fierce. After one punch, he struck the head with a loud bang.
Under the violent impact, the black snake's head swayed backward, and its massive upright body leaned back slightly.
Zhu He's arm went numb. Gritting his teeth, his feet, which had sunk half a foot into the ground, quickly pulled out. Instead of retreating, he charged forward, each step leaving a deep indentation in the stone plateau.
After that head-on collision, Zhu He didn't think he was outmatched!
The black snake again rammed its head forward. Zhu He's internal Qi surged like a river breaking its banks, his blood suddenly vigorous, the muscles in his arms bulging almost to burst his sleeves. With a furious roar, he smashed his fist into the center of the beast's head.
The heavy, full-force blow produced a sound like a hammer striking a giant bell.
The water-vat-sized snake head was punched down onto the stone clearing, sending up a cloud of dust.
Zhu He, gaining the upper hand, was about to press his advantage when the Earth Deity old man behind him sighed softly.
Something swept across his waist. Its speed far surpassed the black snake's two previous head charges, instantly slamming into Zhu He's side. He was hurled over a hundred feet away. Though not fatally wounded, Zhu He was badly cut and bruised, his face covered in blood, clearly seriously injured. He rolled several times on the ground, barely stopping his momentum. Forcing a breath, he swallowed the blood rising to his throat. Ignoring the damage to his internal organs, he prepared to charge forward again to fight the beast to the death.
It turned out the black snake had deliberately shown weakness twice just to set up this lightning-fast tail sweep.
Zhu He's eyes widened, his heart and liver nearly splitting.
From the corner of his eye, he saw the white python arch its body, then suddenly launch an attack at his daughter Zhu Lu, its bloody mouth a shocking sight.
Just then, a slender figure ran along the black snake's back, finally stepping on its head, leaping into the air. The young man, holding a woodcutter's knife, pounced toward the white python.
At the critical moment, the straw-sandaled youth’s knife precisely cut off the white python's left wing!
But the youth was also sent flying backward by the python's tilted body, crashing heavily.
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Somewhere on the mountain ridge below the stone clearing, the bamboo-hatted man sat on a branch of an old pine stretching out over the cliff, taking small sips of wine, expressionless.
He adjusted his bamboo hat and chuckled.